Something we humans all share in common is victim mentality.
Have you ever:
- Not taken responsibility for the situation you found yourself in?
- Neglected your health and wellbeing by not eating well or moving?
- Held grudges?
- Felt powerless and out of control?
- Argued with others because you feel under attack?
- Believed everyone is untrustworthy?
- Thought you’ll never get what you want?
- Avoided or refused to be consistent?
- People pleased?
- Felt abused, unappreciated, rejected or disrespected?
- Compared yourself to others and felt sorry for yourself?
- Told someone it’s not your fault?
- Blown things out of proportion?
- Ignored your feelings?
- Believe others are out to get you?
- Felt that life was working against you?
There are countless other ways we can feel victimised and they’re all rooted in us giving away our power to something ‘outside’ of ourselves.. We feel as if the world is doing things ‘to us’ and that we’re powerless to change it. So we tend to blame something or someone for the situation, because a) that’s what we’ve been programmed to do and b) it’s the easier option and means you don’t have to take responsibility for the circumstance you’ve found yourself in because everything happens ‘outside’ of you and there’s nothing you can do about it. The energy of victimhood is both stagnant and heavy, which makes you feel like you can’t move on. #lowvibesman
Some of us even play the victim unconsciously, because deep down on a cellular level we believe that we deserve to be one — this is a revelation I’ve had just in the past few days and I’ve been doing this deep personal work for years. Because of this recent revelation, I’ve decided that enough is enough if I’m ever going to break free of this matrix mentality. I know that I have the power within me to determine how joyful and loving I can be to myself and others on the daily, so I am using that power to let go of they heaviness of victimhood I no longer choose to attach to. #radicalselfresponsibility
The rise of ‘victimhood culture’ in modern society, perpetrated by social media allowing one’s grievances to go viral, is compounding the problem by encouraging more and more people, especially millennials and GenZrs, to act as if they are victims. As David J Ley wrote in Psychology Today: “To continue with the way we are idealising and rewarding victimhood, creates more and more incentive for people to desire to be seen as victims. We must instead encourage people in a way that supports their ability to move forward in their lives, without needing emotional bodyguards to protect them from the unpreventable pains of life. To do less is disrespectful of them, and it discounts the strength they have within. It treats victims as though they are less than, less than capable, less than independent, and less than whole. It treats victims as though their victimisation is the most important thing about them.”
Know that you are not alone in your struggle. But the voices in your head that tell you you’re unworthy are not real, even though you’ve made them your reality. They’re simply beliefs that you’ve confirmed unconsciously over and over again.
And the good news is because they’re not real, your beliefs can be changed.
So how do we go about shifting our thoughts to change our beliefs of victimisation? It all begins with becoming aware of your false beliefs.
Make the commitment to free yourself from your mental prison and see yourself as a survivor instead. Intend to be more compassionate to yourself. Then forgive yourself for the hurt and anger you feel. And be grateful for the lessons the universe has brought to you — especially the hardest ones.
I know in every fibre of my being that it’s not possible to live a great life if you’re feeling like a victim in any way. Why? Life is always going to knock you down. That’s how life works, we have ups and we have downs. The key is how quickly we are able to bounce back from the downs. And that comes from learning how to be the observer. There’s no dignity in being a victim and if we choose to define ourselves by our traumas, then we become slaves to them. We don’t heal.
Neither do we need the pain of our trauma to continue living. If we can’t rise above them, then we are doomed to being triggered by them over and over and over again. Making yourself wrong will never help you. Making others wrong will never provide growth. Using your pain as a focus will stop you from expanding into your full potential. #facts
And yes, holding onto our victim is the easier option, because who would you be without the attachment to your trauma? See how scary that sounds? But only because of the conditioning we’ve been exposed to since birth. Because it’s what your parents did, your grandparents and all those before them because they didn’t know any better.
But you do.
We don’t often seize the opportunities the universe presents us with, because deep down we are afraid of change — and success. Something most successful people all share in common is their ability to overcome feeling like a victim.
So I’m publicly declaring now that I intend to live from my higher self rather than from my trauma. This is me showing up for myself and my massive action to break the victim cycle I attached to.
It will definitely be more fun living this way.
Who’s with me?